Life lately in the tiny northern Minnesota town of Gilbert has resembled a scene out of an Alfred Hitchcock film. Birds, lots of birds, have been “flying into windows, cars and acting confused,” according to the city police department, which has been fielding reports from anxious residents.
But these birds aren’t out for human blood. They’ve just had a few too many — a few too many overripe berries, that is.
“Certain berries we have in our area have fermented earlier than usual due to an early frost, which in turn has expedited the fermenting process,” Gilbert Police Chief Ty Techar explained in a statement. “It appears that some birds are getting a little more ‘tipsy’ than normal.”
But unable to remain too buttoned-up about the bleary-eyed birds, Techar did crack a few jokes about when residents should call police, such as if they see:
"Woodstock pushing Snoopy off the doghouse for no apparent reason.
“Big Bird operating a motor vehicle in an unsafe manner.
“Any other birds after midnight with Taco Bell items.”
Mokošor Mati Syra Zemlya (literally “Damp Mother Earth”), is a Slavic goddess mentioned in the Primary Chronicle, protector of women’s work and women’s destiny.She watches over spinning and weaving, shearing of sheep, and protects women in child birth.
My muse has to pick one or the other. They have to pick one. Not neither, not both.
Submissive or Dominant? Whips or Chains? Handcuffs or Shibari? Pillow Princess or Power Bottom? Voyeur or
Exhibitionist? Blindfolds or Spreader Bars? Butt Plugs or
Vibrators? Edging or Multiple Rounds? Knots or Ovipositor? Spanking or Scratching? Ball Gag or Muzzle? Strap on or Double
Sided Dildo? On on one or Group Sex? Vanilla or Kinky? Lengthy Cocks or Girthy Cocks? Small Boobs or Large Boobs? Ass
or Chests? Thighs or Arms? Hot Wax or Knifeplay? Loud or Quiet? Biting or Sucking? Collars or Piercings? Costumes or Lingerie Monogamy or Polyamory? Laughing and silliness during sex or
Intensity and power struggle during sex? Fucking a Virgin or
Fucking someone with experience? Face to face or from behind? Phone sex or Sexting? Cumming
inside or Cumming outside Being filled or Bukkake Dirty Talk or Degradation? Role play or Porn on in the background? Public Edging or Filming
in the Bedroom? Condom or Bareback? Lube or Raw? Video Call Masturbation or Sexy Selfies? Blood Play or Breath Play? Face fucking or Anal sex? Leather or PVC? Morning Sex or Evening Sex? Clothes on or
Clothes off?
Dama Cherepaha 